He Changes the Results with His Noodly Appendages

The news is a constant assault for the habitual blogger. What to choose? For over 48 hours, I've been dithering.

Do I talk about this conservative evangelical superchurch leader, Haggard, caught with his pants down, who has apparently now admitted to a pastor some of the charges against him, but not all? ("Yes I hired a rent boy, but the part about buying meth from him is a lie, a total lie!") What's next with that story? Will we soon hear from Haggard that he was fondled as a teenager by some Papist Spawn of Sodom?

Or do I write about how Tony Snow downplayed a leaked Pentagon report that used the term "ethnic cleansing" in describing many of the variables of what might be called the Iraq Chaos Index? That came hot on the heels of PM Maliki telling the U.S. to clear off, get out of the way, let us handle this sectarian violence (I assume so that Shi'ite militias can ethnically cleanse Baghdad unimpeded.) Tony says deaths are down since Ramadan. (How would we know? The Iraqi government has decided it's going to stop reporting mortality figures.) It's just an October 18th snapshot, Tony says. If we all pull together, the sun will shine tomorrow! All this defeatist carping! It's SO unfair!

Do I write about John Kerry, the Cookie Monster of American orators, and his dumb botching of a dumb joke about how dumb Dubya is? Pretty soon we'll be hearing dumb criticism of his dumb apology to the dumb people who didn't realize he dumbly botched a dumb joke about how dumb Dubya is. Man, am I tired of reading about this. Why doesn't the American political system feature an OFF button?

I'm not gonna write about any of that. Read this, instead: the impassioned plea from a beleagured minority religion in America that their version of creation be taught in schools, that it be given equal time. The faithful members of The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster need to have their say, and I say: it's about time.